Wednesday, September 22, 2010
What a day
Well, my own daughter in law set me up and I fell right into it. So much for my credibility with my son. Would you rather have a phony realtionship with someone or a real one with ocasional battles? If is is not worth fighting for it isn't worth anything. I do have to have honesety and loyalty myself becasue without that there is no love.
Tuesday, September 21, 2010
Lately
Lately I don't sleep very well. Up before the dawn with things of this world reeling in my mind. I have children. They are grown now. Two of my sons have children, each one more beautiful then the next.
There have been hardships, a great many times, over the years. In looking back my heart aches at some of the decisions that were made, or not. Bringing me, all of us, to here and now.
My greatest joy was being honored by being someone's mother. That is what I wanted out of life. Sounded simple right? And kids are great. I get better at it as the years go by, and now blessed with grands. But along with that honor comes othere people who do not know me nor at times do they seem to want to. The way of this world stupifies me at times in what seems important to people. For me it is and has always been family.
There have been hardships, a great many times, over the years. In looking back my heart aches at some of the decisions that were made, or not. Bringing me, all of us, to here and now.
My greatest joy was being honored by being someone's mother. That is what I wanted out of life. Sounded simple right? And kids are great. I get better at it as the years go by, and now blessed with grands. But along with that honor comes othere people who do not know me nor at times do they seem to want to. The way of this world stupifies me at times in what seems important to people. For me it is and has always been family.
Sunday, September 19, 2010
Introduction
Today is Sunday September 19, 2010. I would have liked to gone to church today with my family. We have construction going on which is taking everyone's time for the third week. Flowers are trampled but farm building looking good. My husband and his projects. The bigger the better. Nice to see sons working with Dad though. I have rekindled my love for cooking and have spiced up some of my old favorites while keeping everyone fed with enough planning in advance to keep me on track for mealtime. Meat balls and spagetti for dinnner and meatball subs the next day etc. Best of the week, as was voted by my consumers, vegatable beef soup, go figure.
The week ahead is shaping up for me to be keeping two of the five grand babies with others plugging in what they think that should mean for me. Don't just just love unwanted advice from anyone 20-30 something. Forty year old begining to know better. Fifty year olds wait until they are asked. Unless, if course, it is a defensive move.
I have stepped out of the mainstream hubub since last April. We can make it on just my husband's salary. Several traumatic family and work related issues brought me to a resignation from a job I loved and where I was finally was making good money. I saved for a year prior then have sat back since then, traveling for enjoyment and to get back in touch with family individually and recover.
I have 4 brothers and two sisters and our parents have both gone onto a greater reward. That makes us orphans and sad to say we often feel as though we are such. A family reunion was attended by nearly all that first year. The second Family Reunion was less attended and wayyy to much work landed back on me.
So, I plan to visit indivudually and have been, as there are folks whe have judged me to be a control freak when I would just love for everone to get together routinely. I don't mind planning things in fact I do love it. Trying to take in as many opinions as possible throw in somethings really special - such as a custom t-shirts for all. Resolution of the housing issues started with a heck of a deal for everyone and plenty of room, But, everyone wanted their own little group to have a seperate place.
After 9 months of planning everyone who decided to come was asking to get in on the house I had selected, "have an extra room or two?" Family gatherings can be difficult when jealousy is there rather than the good of all. So if it is to come up again, my order is for two rooms, just plug me in after you decide when and where and make sure it is the best place and deal anywhere to be found in the world as we know it. Don't forget to pay for my share and to remind me several times to send my portion no matter how uncomfortable that may be for you. Do you gotta love family??? Well, yes and I still do.
Talk to you later cuz I wanna tell you more and hear about how your life has changed as you are rounding over the hill.
The week ahead is shaping up for me to be keeping two of the five grand babies with others plugging in what they think that should mean for me. Don't just just love unwanted advice from anyone 20-30 something. Forty year old begining to know better. Fifty year olds wait until they are asked. Unless, if course, it is a defensive move.
I have stepped out of the mainstream hubub since last April. We can make it on just my husband's salary. Several traumatic family and work related issues brought me to a resignation from a job I loved and where I was finally was making good money. I saved for a year prior then have sat back since then, traveling for enjoyment and to get back in touch with family individually and recover.
I have 4 brothers and two sisters and our parents have both gone onto a greater reward. That makes us orphans and sad to say we often feel as though we are such. A family reunion was attended by nearly all that first year. The second Family Reunion was less attended and wayyy to much work landed back on me.
So, I plan to visit indivudually and have been, as there are folks whe have judged me to be a control freak when I would just love for everone to get together routinely. I don't mind planning things in fact I do love it. Trying to take in as many opinions as possible throw in somethings really special - such as a custom t-shirts for all. Resolution of the housing issues started with a heck of a deal for everyone and plenty of room, But, everyone wanted their own little group to have a seperate place.
After 9 months of planning everyone who decided to come was asking to get in on the house I had selected, "have an extra room or two?" Family gatherings can be difficult when jealousy is there rather than the good of all. So if it is to come up again, my order is for two rooms, just plug me in after you decide when and where and make sure it is the best place and deal anywhere to be found in the world as we know it. Don't forget to pay for my share and to remind me several times to send my portion no matter how uncomfortable that may be for you. Do you gotta love family??? Well, yes and I still do.
Talk to you later cuz I wanna tell you more and hear about how your life has changed as you are rounding over the hill.
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